The aftermath...

Well it certainly has been too long between posts. It seems like my life has been a bit of a carnival ride for the last couple of weeks and i feel like i have finally hung up my fairy floss and got off the roller coaster.
Lots has been happening - good, bad and ugly. No one ever prepares you for the aftermath of a figure comp. Im sure there were knowledgable people telling me, perhaps even warning me, about the affects of post comp struggles and what was to ensue. However perhaps its just one of those things that you cant ever really prepare for and thus just have to experience and figure out, for the most part, by yourself.
I have experienced the joys of getting up on stage in top condition, the exhilaration of completing a personal goal, the highs of being part of a somewhat misunderstood industry and sport. And then i have experienced the heartbreak of losing my comp figure merely days after i stepped up on stage (a figure people that was completley unrealistic to keep); the confusion of somewhat disordered eatng and the mental angst of finding myself without structure and nothing to strive for anymore.
Geez. Sounds like im ready to hang myself. But Im just trying to highlight the highs and lows of sometimes doing this kind of extreme sport.
It has now taken me 3 weeks to get my head around my new physique, to stop eating everything that i pass by and feel like having, and get myself back into regular exercise and eating patterns. I have finally, after a long 21 days, finally found my balance.
So that brings me to my next bit of news. I have decided not to compete in the october comps this year. I had my plan from my wonderful coaches all ready to go. I had done all my shopping and worked out my schedule. I was ready to start the craziness. And then D day was upon me. i woke up on the morning i was due to start comp prep and knew i just didnt want to do it. I had spoken to Corina the week before and I had mentioned to her that surely i could start my cardio prep at 1hr a day and build up on that, as i didnt have nearly as much weight to lose as last time.
However, the moment she told me that no i still had to do 2hrs of cardio a day and then 3hrs towards the end - i think i lost my mind! It was at that moment i lost my momentum. 3hrs of cardio a day plus weights. Ummmm NO! So that was it, decision made. I broke the news to my coaches a couple of days ago - and although im sure their disappointed they totally understand why i need a break.
Sooooo i needed a new goal, a new challenge. Im just that kind of person. I think at this stage my goal is to run the 1/2 marathon in october. i have always loved running and i feel this would be a good challenge for me to aim for.
So with more balance in all areas of my life, off i start on my new challenge...watch this space people!
xxoo